The Worst Kind of ‘Customers’
Everyday, it seems like, we get the most irritating set of calls. You can almost set your watch to it. They are a drain on time, resources and especially our patience.
Here are some of my favorites that happened just this week:
Customer calls and says they want to find out their order status. Customer gives an order number that is not ours, so they ordered from someplace else. We explain this; and customer says - I know, I ordered from this other .com company. We ask - why don't you call them for your order status? Customer says its because they won't answer the phone, so she is calling here instead. We reply - how are we supposed to help you with another company's order? Customer realizes how stupid this call was, apologizes and hangs up.
No. I did not make that up. It really happened. We've even had people who ordered from Amazon.com call us for their order status.
People seem to forget that many stores carry the same products. You cannot only buy Tide at Walmart. But, if you buy Tide at Walmart, you cannot expect to go to Target and get a refund if you do not like it. It's not that difficult.
It's when a customer is lying that irritates me, personally, the most. I took a call this week from an angry customer who ordered a product and wanted to know the status. I could not locate the customer in our system, so I ask where did they order it from. From you (of course! Geesh!). Okay...so I ask did they order it from a television commercial. They say yes. So I explain that we do not advertise on TV and that its a different company. They said they searched for the company and came up with us. Well, we do sell the product (we are retailers afterall), but do not advertise on TV. I wish there was a way to make that explanation shorter!
But, when banks give customers bad information it is appalling. We had a bank tell a customer to call us about a missing order. Why did the bank have the customer call us? Because the company did not have a phone number on file; the phone operator did an internet search and figured we were the people to call. How are we supposed to respond to a customer who says "the bank said you were the people to call" - of course they believe their bank rather than this poor schlub on the phone. The only thing I could tell that customer was to call the bank back, confirm the information, and that I'd probably never hear about the issue a second time. And I didn't or haven't.
Customer calls and gives us an order number, that is not ours. Again, we explain that she ordered it from someplace else and should contact them. Customer is confused and thought she ordered it from us. Nope - call the people you purchased it from. Customer is now mad at us, because she can't remember where she ordered from and demands we find out where her order is. And she says "I'm never ordering online again!" I'll breathe a sigh of relief.
Customer orders something from television (we don't advertise on television) and demands their order status. It's been 6 weeks, they say! Well, call the people you ordered from. Their phone number doesn't work. Did they bill you? Yes. Check your statement, their phone number is there, most likely. Customer hangs up. You're welcome.
Add to this, the multitude of "SEO companies", pay-per-click engines and general nuisance calls and you get a full slate of complete wastes of time calling in. It's enough to drive a person to madness.
And we wonder why bigger companies like Amazon, Ebay, etal don't make their phone number easy to find. Sometimes questions just answer themselves.