Obama & Hillary: How the Campaign Changed (in Pictures)

It’s been an interesting week for the Obama campaign. Rev. Wright and all that hub-bub. With Hillary laughing her way to the bank – in terms of rising in the polls. Obama’s halo has come off and so has, apparently, the media’s gloves. The picture below tells the entire story.

Old: Hillary: Old. Tired.  Obama: New. The Messiah. An Angel. Hope. Jesus.

New: Hillary: Vibrant. Engaged. Obama: A Zombie?

When the media turns against you and puts prominent photos like this on the web; you got problems. Awful:

obama hillary times change

As a Republican, I’m laughing myself silly of this absolutely ridiculous primary season. Democrats had 2008 tied up. Presidency was theirs to lose. Now? Not so much. I’m not a McCain fan, but it seems more and more likely that the race is his to win. Hillary voters are saying they won’t vote Obama in Nov. Obama voters are saying the same thing.

Of the two, I’d prefer Hillary to win. She’s a pragmatist. Interested in her own survival, much like her husband. He signed welfare reform and passed a balanced budget at the behest of the Republican House/Senate. She’ll do the same. It’s all about the legacy with them.

H/T: Hotair for the ABC link.

Garfield: A Lesson in Schizophrenia

I saw a new(?) site out there that takes Garfield comics, but removes that stupid unfunny fat cat and turns into a lesson in schizophrenia. Here is a sampling of the comics:

Garfield Minus Garfield

It’s hilarious and sad all at the same time. Garfield, as you can see, isn’t really missed and the comic simply morphs into reality. Where the cat doesn’t talk back (or is even present) and Jon is just, more or less, a little insane. Wonderful!

Red Light Cameras: Problems and Solutions

I am not generally a fan of red light cameras. I think it is simply a scam to get more money into the hands of the city; when no apparent harm has been done. Voluntary compliance simply isn’t what it used to be. Anyways, some cameras in TN were mistimed so that tickets were sent out to people who did not, in fact, run red lights. First off, I’d question the sanity of anyone who gets a ticket in the mail and blindly pays it without question – is there any appeals process here or what? 176 people received tickets and paid them without question. Till one person complained. The other 176 were just blindly paying a fine that they did not merit. Ugh.

Seems to be if red light cameras are going to continue, there is a simple solution to the problem, right? If the picture it takes is computerized (and I’m sure it is), then simply have the program that takes the picture query the actual light for it’s status (red/yellow/green) and have that encoded onto the photo itself so there is some sort of reconciliation. Or, better yet, have the camera system not be timed, but rather hooked into the light itself so it turns on when the light is actually red, not when it’s supposed to be red according to some software program.

Seems simple enough.

You’re My Brown Eyed Girl

This story was brought to my attention yesterday by Hot Air. This one is ripe for potty humor but I need to set the stage first:

A 35-year-old woman who sat on her boyfriend’s toilet for so long that her body was stuck to the seat had a phobia about leaving the bathroom, the boyfriend said.

From the story, we know this much about the woman:

Favorite Song: Brown Eyed Girl (come on, that was obvious!)

We also know that she, clearly, cannot spare a square. Nor can she pinch a loaf properly.

But, the real question plaguing your mind right now is: How did they have sex? He claims they had a normal relationship, which means of course doing the nasty business from time to time. So how was it accomplished?

I see two possibilities, besides the possibility of her doing this orally of course.

The most likely one was that when she fell asleep, he rolled her off the toilet, did his business and put her back on. Natural lubricants being present and all, ya know. (Gross, you say! Hey. Someone had to say it!)

Second, I suppose that he could lift the seat up, kinda  position himself there and they could go at it. Larry Craig clearly proved that getting it on in a bathroom is both natural and exciting. So, they were just following in his foot steps.

But most importantly, I think he waited so long to call the cops because he was finally glad that he didn’t have to watch another episode of Oprah. Imagine having two years of being able to watch what you wanna watch. You’d take it, wouldn’t you? I mean, you have a yard. Toilets are simply a luxury, really.

Some women take so long in the bathroom anyways. He might’ve just thought it only -felt- like two years.

Fire Doesn’t Melt Steel: Celebrity Moron Edition

We have another celebrity coming out party. Yet another science major thinks that fire cannot melt steel. I haven’t blogged about these 9/11 truther morons in forever, because the target is just too easy. But celebrities get more press, so it’s fun to laugh at their buffoonery. Here is a quote from the story:

Miss O’Donnell claims the collapse of the World Trade Center towers was “the first time in history that fire has ever melted steel — it is physically impossible.”

Samurai Sword makers, Blacksmiths, Steel smelters, and Steel recyclers all boggle at this amazing concept of fire not being able to melt steel. Where do these people think steel comes from? It’s melted from a mixture of metals. With fire. And shaped. With fire. To make things out of it. And when it’s not needed; it’s torn down and melted, with fire, and recycled to make other things. It’s a very stunning concept, really.

The Steel Growers Farm Association is pleased to know that they have another customer though!

Growing Steel Girders

The customer base for growing steel girders from seeds and letting them grow naturally with sunlight and love; then cutting them down with hammer and chisels just isn’t the business it was eons ago; before, you know, fire was discovered. Accursed blacksmiths! So support your local pre-caveman farmers, generating steel like it was meant to be generated! On farms, from seeds. With love.